Four people stand in line:
OVER REACTING TEXTREADER
OVERLY CALM TEXT READER
CONFUSED TEXT READER
and
PROBABLY RIGHT TEXT READER
A cell phone falls from the sky.
OVER REACTING picks it up.
They each read the cell phone in order.
OVER REACTING (as if in a horror film): I’M LOST!!!
OVERLY CALM (as if delighted): I’m lost.
CONFUSED (as if riding on top of a donkey): I’m lost.
PROBABLYA RIGHT (as if pulled over in a car in a very safe neighborhood): I’m lost.
Another cell phone falls from the sky.
OVER REACTING picks it up.
They each read the cell phone in order.
OVER REACTING (as if driving on the highway and falling asleep): I’M TIRED!!!
OVERLY CALM (as if on vacation and able to sleep for forever): I’m tired.
CONFUSED (as if in the middle of a competitive eating competition): I’m tired.
PROBABLY RIGHT (as if in front of a computer in a cubicle at the end of a work day): I’m tired.
Another cell phone falls from the sky.
OVER REACTING picks it up.
They each read the cell phone in order.
OVER REACTING (as if about to break up a marriage): WE NEED TO TALK.
OVERLY CALM (as if smoking a joint): We need to talk…
CONFUSED (as if their tongue is numb and they have lost the ability to speak): We need to talk.
PROBABLY RIGHT (as if they miss their old friend and want to catch up): We need to talk.
Another cell phone falls from the sky.
OVER REACTING picks it up.
They each read the cell phone in order.
OVER REACING (as if they are about to get into a rumble): You wanna come over!?
OVERLY CALM (as if they are sending a booty call): You wanna come over??? ;)
CONFUSED (as if about to fall off of a cliff): You wanna come over!?
PROBABLY RIGHT (as if they just finished cooking a new recipe): You wanna come over?
Another cell phone falls from the sky.
OVER REACTING picks it up.
They each read the cell phone in order.
OVER REACTING (as if the world is a scary place): I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
OVERLY CALM (as if the world is a scary place): I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
CONFUSED (as if the world is a scary place): I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
Silence.
CONFUSED hands the cell phone to PROBABLY RIGHT.
OVER REACTING, OVERLY CALM and CONFUSED all look at PROBABLY RIGHT with anticipation as they read…
PROBABLY RIGHT (as if the world is a scary place): I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
Silence.
OVERLY CALM: … fuck.
Blackout.
END OF PLAY.
