Scratcher Ticket

SCRATCHER TICKET BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

ERWIN, a Filipino-American man in his 60’s, in front of a table and chair.

ERWIN looks around himself.

ERWIN looks to the sky.

ERWIN takes in his surroundings.

ERWIN: What am I doing here? What do you want from me? Is it supposed to be my time now? Well if you’re telling me it’s my fucking time, I’m telling you you’re fucking wrong. You got that? So you, or whoever is here, or whoever you are, can just fuck off and put me back where I belong.

Silence.

ERWIN: DO YOU HEAR ME! YOU WILL NOT TAKE ME! I WILL NOT GO!

Silence.

ERWIN spits on the floor.

ERWIN: I don’t belong here!

ERWIN turns and see the table and chair behind him.

He slides the chair back with force and sits on it.

Silence.

Then, RYAN enters.

Upon RYAN’s entrance, ERWIN jumps up.

ERWIN: Ryan?

RYAN: Yeah.

ERWIN: What are you doing here?

RYAN walks up to ERWIN and hands him 10 scratcher tickets.

RYAN: Here.

ERWIN: What is this?

RYAN: What does it look like?

ERWIN: What am I supposed to do with these?

RYAN: Umm… scratch them?

ERWIN: Why are you here?

RYAN: I don’t know, Dad. Because for whatever reason, I’m always there?

RYAN moves to a corner and sits.

RYAN: There’s ten of them.

ERWIN looks at RYAN.

ERWIN looks at the scratcher tickets.

ERWIN looks up.

ERWIN: Watch me win.

RYAN shakes his head.

ERWIN scratches one ticket – loss.

ERWIN scratches another ticket – loss.

ERWIN scratches another ticket – loss.

ERWIN scratches another ticket – loss.

ERWIN scratches another ticket – loss.

ERWIN scratches another ticket – loss.

ERWIN scratches another ticket – loss.

ERWIN scratches another ticket – loss.

ERWIN scratches another ticket – loss.

Silence.

RYAN looks at ERWIN.

ERWIN looks at RYAN.

ERWIN holds his final scratcher ticket.

Pause.

Pause.

Pause.

ERWIN puts it in his pocket.

Blackout.

END OF PLAY.

Morning Panic

MORNING PANIC BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

JULIA’S bedroom.

It’s unclear what time it is but… it’s dark.

JULIA pops up from bed.

She looks around.

She notices it’s dark.

But how?

JULIA: … What time is it?

JULIA rolls to her night stand and checks her alarm clock.

Her alarm clock is blinking 12:00.

JULIA: Huh?

JULIA rolls to the other side to check her phone.

It’s dead.

JULIA looks around.

She is quite discombobulated.

JULIA: What’s happening?

JULIA thinks about this question more deeply.

Beat.

JULIA: What day is it?

JULIA panics, she digs in her bag to grab her tablet.

It’s dead.

JULIA takes out her laptop.

It’s dead.

JULIA runs up to her paper calendar.

That’s useless.

JULIA sits in bed looking at the ground.

Her breaths grow deeper into panic.

JULIA: How long did I sleep?

Blackout. 

END OF PLAY.

Self-Care

SELF CARE BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

A stage.

On one table, an open laptop with a blank word document.

At another table is JEFFREY.

What is JEFFREY doing?

Playing a video game.

He hasn’t a care in the world.

He is just playing his video game.

After a moment he looks at the lonely laptop.

Then he notices the audience

He looks at the audience.

Beat.

JEFFREY: What?

JEFFREY goes back to his video game.
…

…

JEFFREY keeps playing his video game.

…

…

We better fade these lights out before you get bored.

(I mean… you probably already are… sorry.)

Blackout.

END OF PLAY.

This is Art

THIS IS ART BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

A blank stage with nothing but a projection surface.

Silence.

A moment of silence.

A long moment of silence.

The silence should last until it feels stupid, really.

Then, THE DIRECTOR enters.

He slowly walks to center stage.

He sits cross legged on the floor.

PROJECTION: This is Art. 

Again, silence.

Again, a moment of silence.

Again, a long moment of silence.

Again, the silence should last until it feels stupid.

Beat. 

PROJECTION: No.

PROJECTION: This is

Beat. 

PROJECTION: Bullshit.

With the final projection still on the screen, THE DIRECTOR stands up.

THE DIRECTOR smiles at the audience.

THE DIRECTOR bows.

Blackout.

END OF PLAY.

Handshake

HANDSHAKE BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

March 14, 9:55 AM.

A school bell rings.

MRS. BROWN stands in front of her classroom door.

MRS. BROWN is wearing orange.

One by one her class lines up in front of her door to be let in.

Almost all of her students are wearing orange.

One by one, MRS. BROWN performs an individual and fun handshake with each of her students as they enter the class. Some of the handshakes include dance moves, some include dabs, many include the “Wakanada Forever” arm gesture.

This ritual takes 4 minutes.

 As soon as the whole class enters, MRS. BROWN steps inside the classroom

She looks at her class and smiles.

She looks at the clock.

It is now 10 AM.

It is March 14th.

MRS. BROWN nods her head.

Her class lines up again, this time to exit the class.

Again, MRS. BROWN performs an individual handshake with each of her students, one by one.

One by one, each of her students walk out of the classroom.

Once the last student exits, MRS. BROWN looks out at her students.

MRS. BROWN: Thank you. Each and every one of you. And Goodluck.

END OF PLAY.

Huh

HUH BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

HANSOL in her office’s parking lot.

She is sitting on the hood of her car eating a sandwich.

It is her lunch break.

She is wearing a pair of earphones.

She is listening to a podcast.

As she takes a bite of her sandwich she notices a tulip.

The tulip is growing from the concrete in the middle of the parking lot.

She chews her bite.

She pauses her podcast.

She slides off her car.

She walks closer to the Tulip.

HANSOL: … Huh.

Beat.

HANSOL watches the Tulip in the wind.

Silence.

HANSOL: … I’ve never noticed you before…

Beat.

HANSOL marvels at the tulip.

HANSOL smiles.

Silence.

Lights fade.

END OF PLAY.

On The Edge

ON THE EDGE BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

Lights up on a hospital waiting room.

Sitting in silence – SAVANNAH and ATHENA.

All that is heard is –

Beep…

Beep…

Beep…

SAVANNAH closes her eyes and takes in the sound.

Beep…

Beep…

Beep…

SAVANNAH breaths with the beeps, hoping it will help soothe her heart.

It works but only for a second.

SAVANNAH opens her eyes and looks over at ATHENA.

They smile at each other and nod.

Beep…

Beep…

Beep…

ATHENA: How you holding up?

SAVANNAH: Hard to tell.

ATHENA: Yeah, I get that.

SAVANNAH: You?

ATHENA: About the same.

SAVANNAH: Yeah.

ATHENA: What can you do, I guess.

SAVANNAH: I just wish we didn’t have to think of something to do.

ATHENA: Right.

Silence.

Beep...

Beep…

Beep…

OMAR – a hospital attendant enters.

ATHENA and SAVANNAH both stand, hoping he has news.

OMAR sees them.

OMAR: Not yet.

OMAR exits.

ATHENA and SAVANNAH sit back down.

ATHENA: He keeps doing that. I don’t know why.

SAVANNAH: What?

ATHENA: He keeps coming out and looking at who’s in the waiting room but he never has any news for any of us.

SAVANNAH: Have there been more people than you?

ATHENA: Not until you arrived.

SAVANNAH: How long have you been here.

ATHENA: Two weeks.

SAVANNAH: Two weeks?

ATHENA: Yeah.

SAVANNAH: Wow…

ATHENA: I wish I had come sooner.

SAVANNAH: What do you mean?

ATHENA: I’ve known something was wrong with me for months, maybe years – but I didn’t come until two weeks ago.

SAVANNAH: I see… And you’re the same as me?

ATHENA: I mean we’re different people –

SAVANNAH: Of course, but the reason we are here. Same?

ATHENA: As far as we know. But OMAR over there isn’t giving us anything else to work with.

SAVANNAH: Jesus…

ATHENA: Yeah.

Silence.

Beep…

Beep…

Beep…

ATHENA: How long have you known?

SAVANNAH: What?

ATHENA: How long have you known that something was wrong?

SAVANNAH: I guess I don’t actually know yet until –

ATHENA: How long have you been suspecting.

SAVANNAH: A while.

ATHENA: Of course. Since, maybe, November?

SAVANNAH: It certainly began to feel worse in November.

ATHENA: Same.

SAVANNAH: … Same.

Pause.

Beep…

Beep…

Beep…

OMAR enters.

This time, before ATHENA and SAVANNAH even get the chance to stand up, he exits.

SAVANNAH: Hey.

ATHENA: Yeah?

SAVANNAH: I’m sorry you’re going through this.

ATHENA: Why are you sorry? You’re going through it too. Presumably.

SAVANNAH: I know but still. It’s hard. So I’m sorry.

ATHENA: Well, thanks… I’m sorry too. For you. And for me, I guess.

SAVANNAH: Hah, yeah.

ATHENA and SAVVANAH share a smile, perhaps even a light laugh.

Beep…

Beep…

Beep…

ATHENA: You know what, though?

SAVANNAH: What?

ATHENA: This has been a whole lot better since you’ve arrived.

SAVVANAH: Really?

ATHENA: Yeah. So Thank you for that.

SAVANNAH: But we didn’t start talking until now.

ATHENA: I know.

SAVANNAH: At first, we spent three straight days in silence.

ATHENA: Yeah but still – silence with company is better than silence and loneliness.

SAVANNAH: You don’t like being alone?

ATHENA: Being alone and loneliness are two different things. I don’t mind being alone. Loneliness… you can kill a person with loneliness.

SAVANNAH nods at ATHENA.

She understands her.

Beep…

Beep…

Beep…

OMAR enters.

OMAR: Oh good.

ATHENA: What?

OMAR: It’s just the two of you.

SAVANNAH: Are you expecting more?

OMAR:I don’t know.

ATHENA: You don’t know?

OMAR: I don’t know much.

SAVANNAH: Aren’t you supposed to be –

OMAR (Suddenly exploding): I am trying my best!

A brief silence.

SAVANNAH: Ok…

OMAR: Sorry.

SAVANNAH: Ok.

ATHENA: Do you have any information.

OMAR: Information?

ATHENA: For me. Do you have any information for me?

OMAR: No.

ATHENA: Of course.

OMAR: Not yet.

ATHENA (Beginning to lose her temper): Will you ever have information?

SAVANNAH: Athena… He’s trying his best.

ATHENA begins to calm down.

ATHENA: Fine.

OMAR: Thank you.

ATHENA: Fine.

OMAR: We are all working very hard.

SAVANNAH: But please. Give us something. When you can.

OMAR: Right… When I can.

OMAR exits.

Beep…

Beep…

Beep…

SAVANNAH: Sorry, I didn’t mean to –

ATHENA: No, no. I needed that. Blowing up at him wasn’t gonna do us any good. Thank you for that.

SAVANNAH: You’re welcome.

Pause.

JOSE enters.

ATHENA and SAVANNAH stand up, thinking it’s OMAR with news.

They see it’s someone new.

JOSE: Is this the –

ATHENA: Have you already been checked out?

JOSE: Yes.

ATHENA: Who are you waiting for to give you results?

JOSE: OMAR.

ATHENA: You’re in the right place.

JOSE: Oh. Good.

ATHENA: I wouldn’t say good just yet…

SAVANNAH: She’s been here for a while.

ATHENA, SAVANNAH and JOSE all sit down.

JOSE: A while?

SAVANNAH: I’ve been here for three days.

JOSE: Three days!?

SAVANNAH: Wait for it –

ATHENA: I’ve been here for two weeks.

JOSE: Jesus Christ –

ATHENA: He might walk through these doors with answers before OMAR does.

JOSE buries his face into his hands.

ATHENA: Oh, I didn’t mean to –

SAVANNAH: Hey… don’t… Hey. What’s your name?

JOSE looks at SAVANNAH.

JOSE: JOSE.

SAVANNAH: It’s nice to meet you JOSE.

ATHENA: Welcome.

SAVANNAH: I’m Savannah.

ATHENA: I’m Athena.

JOSE: Hello.

SAVANNAH: We’ve both been here for a while but… Don’t worry. It’ll be ok.

ATHENA: It gets better the more people walk in here. Before she walked in the door I just about wanted to die. Now that you’re here we can have a party.

SAVANNAH is amused at ATHENA.

JOSE, less so.

Pause.

Beep…

Beep…

Beep…

JOSE closes his eyes and takes in the sound.

JOSE breaths with the beeps, hoping it will help soothe his heart.

It works but only for a second.

JOSE opens his eyes.

SAVANNAH: JOSE.

JOSE: Yes?

SAVANNAH: What are you here for?

JOSE: What am I hear for?

SAVANNAH: Yeah, what are you symptoms?

JOSE: Oh…

SAVANNAH: Is that too personal a question.

JOSE: It’s not that it’s just…

ATHENA: What?

JOSE: I don’t know… I just… I didn’t know this would be a problem. I never thought I’d be the type of person to fall into this but… clearly, I was wrong.

SAVANNAH: I felt the same. For what I have. For what I think I have.

ATHENA: I have it too.

JOSE: Really?

SAVANNAH: Yeah.

JOSE: Can I ask you? Can I ask you guys what you’re here for.

SAVANNAH: Sure.

ATHENA: Yeah.

SAVANNAH: We’re here because we’ve lost hope…

ATHENA: I felt void of hope for a long time before I came here. I thought it was just a thing. Just a phase. That it would come back to me eventually but. It never did.

SAVANNAH: And I thought I was the only one who had this problem so if hope was never coming back to me, how would they know how to help me? They wouldn’t. So I just kept living life, trying to accept that that was what it was going to be.

ATHENA: Lonely and without hope.

SAVANNAH: But look – who would’ve thought. There’s two of us. And here we are.

JOSE looks at SAVANNAH and ATHENA.

JOSE: Three.

ATHENA: What?

JOSE: Three of us.

SAVANNAH: You’re here for –

JOSE: Same.

ATHENA: Same.

Pause.

SAVANNAH: Same.

The three of them look at each other.

Beep…

Beep…

Beep…

OMAR enters.

ATHENA, SAVANNAH and JOSE stand up.

JOSE: Anything?

OMAR: I’m sorry.

JOSE: Nothing?

OMAR: I’m sorry…

SAVANNAH: What are you sorry about?

OMAR begins to cry.

OMAR: I don’t know what to do.

ATHENA: About what?

OMAR: I don’t what to do for you. For you. For you… For me.

Silence.

Beep…

Beep…

Beep…

ATHENA looks at OMAR.

ATHENA: Same.

OMAR nods his head.

OMAR: Same.

OMAR sits with ATHENA, SAVANNAH and JOSE.

SAVANNAH holds OMAR’S hand.

SAVANNAH: Same.

Lights fade.

END OF PLAY.

At The Beep

AT THE BEEP BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

A beep.

CHLOE:

            (On the phone)

Hi.

It’s me.

And by me I mean Chloe.

I know.

“I haven’t heard from Chloe in forever.”

Well, here I am.

Um.

You’re probably wondering why I’m calling.

Why I’m leaving a voicemail.

Well.

Um.

Me too. Kinda.

But.

I guess I’m calling to see if…

…

Do you wanna meet up?

If you’d like to see me, I’d really love to see you.

And look, I honestly have no idea how things are for you right now.

What your life is anymore.

For all I know you’re married with a ton of kids.

Or gay.

And married.

With a ton of kids.

I don’t know.

But in case however your life is right now fits with seeing me again…

I’d really like that.

            (Beat)

It’s just…

Look.

I know it’s been 20 years.

And I know that’s a bit weird but –

I miss you.

I miss us.

Not to say I’ve spent the past 20 years moping around non stop about you because if someone has – do not meet them.

But… seriously…

After I left I spent a lot of time finding myself again.

Finding who I was without you.

And I found that.

All things considered, I’m doing really, really well.

Hell – the Warriors are good!

But…

…

How do I put this?

You know how people say you have to be ok with being alone before you can be with someone?

Well I figured that out.

I did.

But also.

I figured out that that doesn’t always make sense.

Cause even if you are ok with being alone. – what if you already know the person who makes it better?

What if you already know who makes life better.

Makes you better?

Makes the drips of the coffee maker in the morning better.

Makes the crunch of the fallen leaves in the fall better.

Makes the turn of a page in your favorite book better…

If you know who that person is –

Why bother with being alone?

Even if you’re ok with it.

Why not be better?

…

            (Beat)

So please.

Again – if you’re not married or… dead.

Please call me back.

Please see me.

Because I think that we… were better.

A voice recording -

“To send this message, press one.

To re-record  this message, press two.

To delete this message, press three.”

…

CHLOE presses three.

END OF PLAY.

It Was a Pleasure

IT WAS A PLEASURE BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

ARCHIE:

Hey, thanks for coming in. Take a seat.

Yeah.

Um. Where should I start?

Well, first off – thank you.

For everything you’ve done for this company.

I want to thank you for all of that.

…

Actually that thank you comes from the whole company.

Or at least the – you know – management.

Bill, Drew, Lawrence – all of them.

They, um, thank you.

…

…

Right. So now that I’ve, properly thanked you.

I have the…

            (Pause. Clears his throat.)

Sorry.

            (Clears his throat again. Pause again.)

This isn’t –

            (Another pause. Longer than the other two.)

I have been given the task to.

…

Let me start over.

Myself, Bill, Drew and Lawrence all want to thank you for the work you’ve done for this company.

…

Although, yes, I know I am not a part of that group. I am not – technically – a part of management but I am…

The one they sent here to do this.

So.

Yes.

Right.

Um.

            (Clears his throat.)

I have been given the unfortunate task of telling you that…

…

…

You are going to have the opportunity to reach for dreams you’ve never had the chance to reach for before. What do I mean by that?

…

Good question.

Um.

I am not good at this.

But this isn’t about me.

This is about you.

You and your…

Opportunity.

That we –

They –

Management –

Not me –

Management is giving you…

            (Clears his throat)

Yes.

Do you want some water?

I forgot my water bottle when I came in here.

I must’ve left it on my desk…

            (Deep breath)

Oh god.

Ok.

I’m going to just get it out there.

Yes.

Ok.

Here we go.

Ready?

I have been given the unfortunate task of –

I’m sorry. What was that?

…

You what?

You quit?

            (Suddenly comfortable)

Well jeez! That’s great news!

What? No. We don’t want to get rid of –

I mean, yes, we were actually supposed to –

Well I was supposed to –

You know.

But you quit first!

Before I got to do it!

No, I wasn’t going to quit. Are you crazy?

I was supposed to –

            (Pause. Clears his throat.)

Doesn’t matter.

It was a pleasure working with you.

END OF PLAY.

Changing Lanes

CHANGING LANES BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

MILLIE:

Wait, no Mom, I think you misunderstood me.

Yes, I am changing majors.

But Mom –

Mom –

MA!

LISTEN TO ME.

I think you misunderstood me.

Or you’re not listening to me, because let’s be real –

Ok. Just. Let me –

The reason, I think you’re not listening to me, is because you are upset.

And the news I just gave you, should not make you upset.

The news I gave you should make you… thrilled!

…

I don’t want to be an art major anymore!

I can’t do it! I give up!

…

            (Responding to the lack of response)

Yaaaaay?

Why aren’t you yaaaaay-ing?

…

Mom.

Are you ok? Do you have a fever or something?

Didn’t you hear me?

Don’t you know what this means?

You were right!

I didn’t have what it takes!

You win!

You won the argument!

Celebrate!

            (Pause, trying to clarify)

I’m switching majors.

I’m not dropping out of school. Did you think I was dropping out of school?

No, just switching it up.

I’m going to try to be a lawyer now.

I’m changing course.

Correcting course.

Doesn’t that sound better to you?

            (Pause, still not understanding her mom’s incredulousness)

Oh - and I’m making the change in time!

Like I realized I was approaching my exit right before I passed it.

Swoosh! Made it in!

It wasn’t too late.

No accidents.

No problems!

Changing lanes right on time!

…

            (Silence. Beat. Confusion.)

You know, mom, I’m really –

I don’t know what to make of what is happening right now.

Your face.

I don’t know what to make of your face.

We spent the entirety of my senior year of high school fighting with each other over my choice to study studio art and now that I’m deciding to not study studio art you’re…

You look upset.

I’m going to be a lawyer?

What?

Do you not think I have it takes for that either?

Because I’ll have you know that –

…

Mom.

Why are you acting like this?

Why do you look sad to see me quit the thing you never wanted me to do in the first place?

…

You look sad to see me quit.

…

…

I –

You’re sad I –

You’re sad I quit.

…

…

…

            (A moment of silence as this sinks in)

I quit.

…

Oh.

End of Play.