It Was a Pleasure / by Jeffrey Lo

March 10 2018 - It Was a Pleasure.jpg

IT WAS A PLEASURE BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

 

ARCHIE:

Hey, thanks for coming in. Take a seat.

Yeah.

Um. Where should I start?

Well, first off – thank you.

For everything you’ve done for this company.

I want to thank you for all of that.

Actually that thank you comes from the whole company.

Or at least the – you know – management.

Bill, Drew, Lawrence – all of them.

They, um, thank you.

Right. So now that I’ve, properly thanked you.

I have the…

            (Pause. Clears his throat.)

Sorry.

            (Clears his throat again. Pause again.)

This isn’t –

            (Another pause. Longer than the other two.)

I have been given the task to.

Let me start over.

Myself, Bill, Drew and Lawrence all want to thank you for the work you’ve done for this company.

Although, yes, I know I am not a part of that group. I am not – technically – a part of management but I am…

The one they sent here to do this.

So.

Yes.

Right.

Um.

            (Clears his throat.)

I have been given the unfortunate task of telling you that…

You are going to have the opportunity to reach for dreams you’ve never had the chance to reach for before. What do I mean by that?

Good question.

Um.

I am not good at this.

But this isn’t about me.

This is about you.

You and your…

Opportunity.

That we –

They –

Management –

Not me –

Management is giving you…

            (Clears his throat)

Yes.

Do you want some water?

I forgot my water bottle when I came in here.

I must’ve left it on my desk…

            (Deep breath)

Oh god.

Ok.

I’m going to just get it out there.

Yes.

Ok.

Here we go.

Ready?

I have been given the unfortunate task of –

I’m sorry. What was that?

You what?

You quit?

            (Suddenly comfortable)

Well jeez! That’s great news!

What? No. We don’t want to get rid of –

I mean, yes, we were actually supposed to –

Well I was supposed to –

You know.

But you quit first!

Before I got to do it!

No, I wasn’t going to quit. Are you crazy?

I was supposed to –

            (Pause. Clears his throat.)

Doesn’t matter.

It was a pleasure working with you.

END OF PLAY.