WHEELS ON THE BUS BY JEFFREY LO (DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)
TRISTIN, a calm and quiet woman in her 60’s on the bus.
This is TRISTIN’s usual route.
TRISTIN likes to sit quietly on her usual route.
She finds it soothing,
Silence.
Soothing silence.
The bus stops to pick up the next group of passengers.
TRISTIN nods at the folks she recognizes.
They smile back.
Then a new girl enters the bus.
That new girl is MARISSA.
The new girl, MARISSA sits next to TRISTIN.
MARISSA: Hi.
TRISTIN: Hi.
Pause.
MARISSA: How are you?
TRISTIN: Ok.
Pause.
TRISTIN feels MARISSA anticipating more.
TRISTIN clears her throat.
TRISTIN: How are you?
MARISSA: You know… odd. You know how that is?
TRISTIN: I’m not sure, to be honest.
MARISSA: I’m sure you do.
TRISTIN: I’m not so sure,
MARISSA: Well –
Pause.
TRISTIN: Well?
MARISSA: You know.
TRISTIN: Ok.
Silence.
TRISTIN thinks she got off easy.
Back to the soothing silence.
Then –
MARISSA: You ever notice how many funny things happen to us everyday?
TRISTIN: No.
MARISSA: So many funny things happen to us everyday.
Pause.
TRISTIN: Like?
MARISSA: Like lines.
TRISTIN: Lines?
MARISSA: Lines. Like you know, when we are at the grocery store and want to pay for our stuff we stand in line?
TRISTIN: That’s funny?
MARISSA: But like, why do we do that?
TRISTIN: That’s how the world works.
MARISSA: But no one talks about it. Like… no one asked me if I thought that was the way we should do things.
TRISTIN: Ok. Do you have a better idea than lies?
MARISSA: No, but that’s not what I’m talking about.
TRISTIN: Then what are you talking about?
MARISSA: I’m talking about how funny they are.
TRISTIN: Ok.
MARISSA: Cause it’s funny.
TRISTIN: Sure.
MARISSA: And you know what else is funny?
TRISTIN: I’m sure you’re about to tell me.
MARISSA: Money.
TRISTIN: Money?
MARISSA: Money.
TRISTIN: Ok. Tell me about money.
MARISSA: It’s just pieces of paper.
TRISTIN: Pieces of paper.
MARISSA: So, in other words – money is just bullshit.
TRISTIN: Well if you’re looking into getting rid of some bullshit, feel free to let me help you with that.
MARISSA: But we need the bullshit. Ya know?
TRISTIN: Don’t have to tell me twice.
MARISSA: Which is like some sort of sick joke – to make us NEED bullshit. Like… we NEED the bullshit THE MAN produces even though we all KNOW it’s BULLSHIT. Like… it’s such a power move from the BULLSHIT MAN.
TRISTIN considers this.
Silence.
TRISTIN: I agree.
MARISSA: You do?
TRISTIN: Yeah. You have a point there.
MARISSA: I know I do.
The bus halts for it’s next stop.
MARISSA looks up.
MARISSA: Oh, that’s me.
TRISTIN: Alright.
MARISSA: Bye.
TRISTIN: Goodbye.
MARISSA exits the bus.
TRISTIN stays seated.
Silence.
Soothing silence.
Lights fade.
END OF PLAY.