November Shifts / by Jeffrey Lo

NOVEMBER SHIFTS BY JEFFREY LO
(DOWNLOAD PDF HERE)

November 1st.

JON wakes up on a couch. 

 

JON: Uhh…

 

JON looks around and looks at himself.

JON realizes he is still wearing his Halloween costume – a pirate.

 

JON: Landry!

LANDRY (offstage):You’re awake!

JON: Landry!

LANDRY (offstage):Yeah?

JON: Why am I still wearing my Halloween costume?

LANDRY (offstage):Because you never took it off.

JON: Very funny.

LANDRY (offstage):What’s funny? It’s true.

JON: Why didn’t I take it off last night?

LANDRY (offstage):I don’t know.

JON: Why don’t you know?

LANDRY (offstage):I didn’t ask.

JON: Ugh, you’re not helpful.

LANDRY (offstage):I believe I am helpful. You slept on my couch. Without me, you’re sleeping on a sidewalk or something.

JON: Whatever…

LANDRY (offstage):Anyway, Halloween is over, and we gotta get going! It’s a new month!

JON: Get going where?

LANDRY (offstage):Halloween is over!

JON: So…

LANDRY (offstage):Hey Jon, come over here. Come check this out.

 

JON groans.

 

LANDRY (offstage):Come on Jon! Come check this out.

 

JON stands up and makes his way to where LANDRY is.

JON sees LANDRY.

 

JON: What the…

LANDRY (offstage):Like it?

JON: Already?

LANDRY (offstage):What do you mean already?

JON: It’s November 1st.

LANDRY (offstage):Exactly!

JON: I’m still in a Halloween costume!

LANDRY (offstage):You’re the one that’s late, buddy.

JON: This is ridiculous…

 

JON starts making his to the couch.

 

JON: It is not time for this.

LANDRY (offstage):Yeah it is!

JON: No it’s not.

 

LANDRY emerges wearing full on Christmas garb.

Like… intense Christmas garb.

 

JON: You look insane.

LANDRY: It’s the holiday season!

 

JON lets out a sigh.

Blackout.

 

END OF PLAY.